I have a bone to pick. I was off to a stellar start on a lovely college football saturday when I received a text message that would go on to ruin my entire day. The time was 4:17pm, and I was licking my chops after an unreal first half from Memphis, and as a loyal reader, you know that I housed Memphis both +3 and ml. And then I got this text message:Now, I know not everyone believes in the power of the mush, but I knew it was time to tear up the ticket. Memphis proceeded to shit out the worst half of football these eyes have ever seen, going on to lose 41-56 after leading 38-21 at the half. By the power of the Mookie Mush, Memphis seemingly just forgot how to play football. They scored 3 (THREE!) points in a half. Their top running back looked like Helen Keller stumbling through a muddy hog farm, gaining an entire 3 yards after rushing for over 200 in the first half. UCF scored on all 5 of their second half drives. These things simply don’t happen. They don’t. Unless a very powerful mush sorcerer casts his mush spell aaaaaaaand here we are. I’m lookin at you Mookie, this one falls squarely on your shoulders and I just hope you use your mush powers for good in the future.
PS, I wasn’t on Georgia but if you were, I have good news. You too have a qualm with Mookie as this was the very next text in that chain! (Ignore my shitty computer and its inability to determine if a text has in fact been delivered)
Mookie Mush strikes again!